Classic Fairy Tales and Laughing Quotations

1      

  Mom wakes up Pipi:“Hurry up! The rooster has crowed several times!”

Pipi said:“What is the relationship between rooster crowing and me? I'm not a hen!”

2

Dad told his daughter about how he often went hungry when he was a child. After listening, her daughter tearfully asked:

　　“Oh, dad, did you come to our house because you didn't have any food to eat?”

3

Tong Tong asked his mother:“Why do you call Mr. Jiang‘Ancestors’？”

Mom said:“because‘Ancestors’It is a term of address for a deceased person.”

Tong Tong said:“Is that the deceased grandmother going to scream‘Fresh milk’？”

  The posture of the most insightful person in history

4

Mom often reminds Xiaomei:“You cannot swing while wearing a skirt, otherwise the little boy will see the little underwear inside!”

One day, Xiaomei happily said to her mother:“Mom, today I had a swing competition with Xiao Ming, and I won!”

Mom said angrily:“Didn't I tell you? Don't swing while wearing a skirt!”

Xiaomei proudly said:“But I'm so smart! I took off my little underwear inside so he wouldn't be able to see it!”

5

The daughter was very curious about the navel, so she asked her father, who briefly explained the principle of connecting the umbilical cord between the fetus and the mother's body, saying that the baby is After opening the mother's body, the doctor cut off the umbilical cord and tied a knot, which later became the navel.

My daughter said, 'Why doesn't the doctor tie a bow?'?

6

Xiaoming went to his grandmother's birthday banquet and when it was time to eat the birthday bun, Xiaoming asked:“Why do we have to eat such buttocks like birthday buns?”

The crowd turned pale upon hearing this.

Then Xiaoming broke open the longevity package, looked at the bean paste inside, and said:“Grandma, look! There's still shit inside!”Everyone fainted and vomited.

7

Father: Pierre, don't go to school today. Your mother gave you two little brothers last night. Just tell the teacher.

Pierre: Dad, I only said I gave birth to one, and the other one. I want to keep it for next week when I don't want to go to school.

8

Dad Buck was sitting on a bench in the park resting, and there was a child standing next to him for a long time, never leaving. Buck was very

Strange, just ask:“Little angel, why do you always stand here?”

The child said:“This bench has just been painted, I want to see what you look like when you stand up.”

9

One day after school, a little boy asked his mother:“Mom, where the hell am I from?”

Mom thinks this question is not easy to answer, but she should take this opportunity to educate her child and seriously use cats and dogs as an example to ramble about the reproductive process.

After the son finished listening, he mistily said:“How could this happen? My desk mate said he's from Shanxi!”

10

My two and a half year old daughter often says funny things.

One day while watching Africans dancing on TV, she suddenly asked:“Mom, why didn't this uncle wash his face?”

11

Mom: Pierre, do you want to eat a cookie?

Pierre didn't respond, and his mother asked, "Pierre, do you want to eat a cookie?

Pierre said, 'I want to eat, Mom.'.

Mom said, Why do I have to ask you twice?

Pierre: Because I want to eat two pieces.

12

Little boy: I want to buy that sanitary napkin.

Waiter: Did your mother ask you to buy it?

Little boy: No.

Waiter: Is that your sister?

Little boy: Not really. I want to buy it.

Waiter: What are you doing with sanitary napkins?

Little boy: I watched TV and said: With it, you can swim, skate, and play tennis.

13   

Xiao Mao went to kindergarten and one day, the teacher asked, "Who knows how many countries there are in the world?

Xiao Mao said: I know!

The teacher said, 'Can you tell me which countries are there?'.

Xiao Mao said: There are two countries, China and foreign countries!

14

The little boy ate at his aunt's house, and she cooked fish for him to eat.

The little boy said while eating, 'This fish is really delicious. It would be even better if it didn't have thorns!'!

15

The six-year-old daughter asked seriously and seriously:“Mom, does the table have legs?“

Mom:“Of course it has legs, otherwise how would it stand up?”

Daughter:“So why doesn't it leave?”

16、

The son said, "The baby squats in the mother's belly first, and then crawls up to him*In my mouth, my mother just spat out, and the child came out!

　　17、

The baby was sleeping when a mosquito flew onto his buttocks.

Dad drove away mosquitoes and wiped some toilet water on the baby's buttocks.

The baby woke up with a start and shouted, 'Mom, the mosquito just peed on my buttocks!'!   

18、

I was playing with Xiaodou by the city wall when Xiaodou suddenly saw a child sketching from life,

He looked at them for a while and then asked me: Uncle, they must be very poor, right? How laborious they are in drawing like this, why not buy a camera? How convenient that would be!

19、

Mom, how did I grow up?

Lele looked at her childhood photos and asked curiously.

As soon as my mother heard this, the opportunity for education came and she said, 'You were raised by my mother with a handful of feces and urine.'. Lele cried as soon as she heard it: Why did you give me this to eat? Wu~~

20、

At night, parents are playing a video of their younger brother taken during the day,

My younger brother came in and suddenly shouted, 'Piracy!'! Hurry up and turn off the TV,

Then he took a serious pat on his chest and said, 'Don't look at pirated versions, if you want to see them, you must look at genuine ones.'.   

21、

I rented a house in the east of the city, and the landlord has a son who is six years old. He is mischievous, clever, and cute, especially known for his imitation ability.

Due to being young, advanced sayings and behaviors are often published and recorded without losing joy.

The next day when I returned home, the landlord's son saw me and pointed out with a straight face that it was this uncle who said it. Make his father laugh and cry uncontrollably.

It turned out that the landlord's son was dissatisfied with the food and always wanted to eat cat meat before I returned home. Ask why. He said that after eating it, he can grow clean white fur like the beloved kitten in his family. Oh, I know. Yesterday, the little guy asked me why I have so much hair on my legs.

I told him that it was because I ate pork and the pig had fur on it, so it grew out.   

22、

When the baby was two years old, it was the first time they went to the aquarium with their little aunt to see marine life. When the aunt asked him what fish was in the water tank, they all replied: it was braised fish.

23、

Beibei accidentally broke his forehead, and his mother applied some purple potion to him. Sai'er, who was drawing, saw it,

Q: Ah, who drew on your head? What a bad guy!

24、

At home, I eat buns, and the baby says to his father, 'Give me a bun!'!

Dad said to Miao Miao: Don't talk about buns, talk about buns.

The baby nodded to remember. At night, the baby suddenly pointed at his father's arm and said, "Dad, your arm has been bitten by a mosquito, making a bun!

25、

During the meal, Beibei grabbed a napkin and dipped some soup in the bowl,

Then he gestured towards his father's nose and said in surprise, 'Wow, there's so much runny nose.'.

26、

My colleague's daughter is less than three years old.

One day, a colleague woke up from a nap and realized that the child beside him was missing. He turned his head and saw a little thing sitting in front of the dressing table, taking her***The cosmetics covered his face and turned a big red lip. He smiled from his mother's canthus and said——“Do you think I'm as fair as milk?”

27、

My little nephew loved sleeping when he was young, and once he slept until the sun found his face.

Poor shout: Turn off the light! Turn off the light!

After telling him it was the sun, he impatiently shouted, 'Turn off the sun!'!

28、

One of her colleagues has a6My year-old daughter is starting to change her teeth,

Her mother took her back to work after pulling out her teeth,

My mother asked her:“Do your teeth still hurt?”

The little girl's answer made the group of people next to her all laugh:“Ah, my teeth have been left in the hospital, I don't know if it hurts!”